The way writers make stories leap off the page is magical—and meeting the magicians behind these feats can be, too; realizing that a real-life person like us dreamed up these spellbinding words, images, and characters; learning the secrets of their craft. On Wed., Oct. 30, Lower and Middle School students were thrilled to have this opportunity, when they welcomed New York Times-bestselling author Sharon Draper, the mind behind Holton reading-list books Blended and Out of My Mind and more than 20 other works.

Draper told students she never imagined she would or could be a writer. Instead, she began her career as an English teacher in Cincinnati, drawn to the field by her love of words. One day, a struggling student challenged her, "You think you're so good at this, why don't you write something?"

So she did. "That was kind of the trigger that made me think maybe I could do this," Draper told Holton students.

She wrote a short story and submitted it to a magazine contest. When it won, she was shocked—and elated. It was her first published piece, and it gave her the confidence and momentum to attempt a longer work. Her first book, Tears of a Tiger, was published just a few years later in 1994, and won her the first of her five Coretta Scott King Awards.

The author's catalog tackles a broad range of timely social issues and features diverse voices—voices that Draper said she didn't necessarily find in literature when she was growing up, and that she felt her students were seeking as well. Blended, a new addition to Holton's Gr. 5 curriculum and a Middle School summer reading choice, follows an 11-year-old girl navigating racial identity and the aftermath of her parents' divorce. Another Lower and Middle School favorite, Out of My Mind, is told from the perspective of a preteen who has cerebral palsy—a girl who, as one Holton student said, "is brilliant, but others can't see it because of her disability."

How did Draper picture this latter character, one Middle Schooler wanted to know. "I don't," the writer said. "I try not to, because if I've done my job right, you picture her. I just need to include enough details so she comes to life for you." Draper explained that she's heard from readers all over the world, and they all picture the character differently, based on their own perspectives, identity, and environment.

"That tells me I'm onto something—that the character resonates with people from so many different places and backgrounds," Draper said.

The writer encouraged students to notice the close-up details in their own lives. These real-life details, she said, are what will make their writing come to life, too.

Students were especially interested in the process of publishing a book. Draper discussed all the stages, from ideas ("they just come to me," "it just needed to be written") to first draft to final publication ("most books go through 20, 30, even 40 revisions").

"Writing is a continuous, continuous, continuous, continuous revision," she said. When your teachers make you practice revising, it actually is important, she said with a smile.

Students were surprised to learn all that goes into publishing a book. "I loved learning about the process," said Claire '25. "I had no idea it took so long for books to come out and all the work that authors have to do."

Annabelle '28 and NiuNiu '28 were especially interested in how much research goes into stories to make them more authentic—"like if it's a book about flying a plane, how you'd have to basically learn how to fly a plane," they noted.

Do your research, said Draper, but also write about what you know and are passionate about. We all have our own strengths and our own stories.

The School looks forward to welcoming several other authors this year. These include Kate Hannigan, whose fictional and nonfiction works feature important but lesser-known women in history. She will speak with the Lower School later this month.

Previous Holton author talks have featured Matt de la Peña, author of the Newbery-winning Last Stop on Market Street; Shannon Messenger, creator of the Keeper of the Lost Cities series; and Reshma Saujani, writer of Girls Who Code: Learn to Code and Change the World.

Middle School Chinese classes welcomed a special guest speaker on Oct. 29: Julie Sweet, Chief Executive Officer of multinational consulting services company Accenture, discussed how taking risks and facing challenges can help you grow as a person. According to the New York Times, Mrs. Sweet is "one of the most powerful women in corporate America." (She is also a Lower and Middle School parent.)

Mrs. Sweet grew up in California. In middle school, her parents encouraged her to join the debate team, which she said helped her become a better speaker. In college, Mrs. Sweet showed her willingness to take risks. At the age of 19, she decided to study in Taiwan and China for a year. She did not speak the language and knew little about the culture but thought it would be the best way to learn Chinese. She taught English and modeled for a wedding photography company, while living with a host family in Taiwan that did not understand English. Later, being in China helped her learn to use Chinese effectively and taught her to take risks, deal with challenges, and adapt to new situations. These are all skills that have no doubt helped her to become a successful businesswoman.

Mrs. Sweet's advice to students included:

1. Communication skills are very important. Writing well and speaking clearly will carry you very far. Being able to deliver a speech for 30 minutes without a script is how Mrs. Sweet got to where she is today.

2. Successful people take risks and face challenges.

3. If your dreams do not scare you, they are not big enough.

Boosters held its annual fall induction ceremony on Fri., Nov. 1, welcoming and recognizing four new members: Kelsey Frederick '21, Nora Hemsley '22, Estelle Monti '22, and Lily Muhlbaum '22.

The names of new members remained a surprise to the community and inductees themselves until the morning assembly—although their families were notified in advance and were present for the ceremony. During the event, Boosters Co-presidents Eliza Gichner '20 and Maryam Garavi '21 and fellow Boosters read a statement about each inductee and awarded her a certificate, a Booster patch, and an official Booster pin, which she must wear for a week.

Boosters is a long-running in-school service club that gives back to the school and community through its participation in a range of events and activities. Induction into the club is based on the number of campus community service hours accrued while in high school. Students earn service hours by serving as tour guides; volunteering in the school store, Advancement Office, College Resource Room, Brown House, or Head of School's Office; assisting the Alumnae Board and Alumnae Office; working at Back to School Night and Reunion; and filling other volunteer needs throughout the school.

Booster qualifications include: integrity, a constructive and helpful attitude in all aspects of school life, a cooperative spirit, a pleasant and courteous disposition toward faculty and students, a respect for school regulations and honest effort to conform to them, a genuine interest in the welfare of the school, and sincere participation in and support of its activities.

The club holds induction ceremonies twice a year.

We applaud all of our Boosters for their service to the school and congratulate the newest members!

Winter sports have begun, so be sure to grab your winter athletic apparel! All winter teams and general athletics have a site with both men's and women's Under Armour apparel, available at a discounted cost. Items will be ordered when the site closes on Sat., Nov. 16 at midnight. Items will be delivered to School before we close for Winter Break.

Click on your desired sport below to view its apparel site:

Athletics

Basketball

Ice Hockey

Swim and Dive

Winter Crew

Winter Track

Ten fall athletes were recently honored with the Middle School Panther Pride Award: Lila Brody '24, Addison Burakiewicz '24, Sophie Famili '25, Kennedy Hall '25, Claudia Moore '24, Britt Nordquist '24, Alexandra Posner '24, Halle Powers '24, Hayley Richardson '24, and Lilly Spector '24.

The Athletic Department created the award at the beginning of the 2018-2019 school year to provide special recognition to Middle School sports. It is given each season to student-athletes that the coaching staff feels best exemplify the following characteristics while participating in Middle School athletics: determination, work ethic, sportsmanship, perseverance, teamwork, responsibility, respect, and leadership.

Congratulations, Panthers!

The School's 2018-2019 Scroll + Scrolling literary magazine was just named a 2020 Crowd Award Finalist in the high-school hybrid literary magazine category by the Columbia Scholastic Press Association (CSPA). This marks the seventh consecutive year that Holton has earned this honor. Just four other publications from across the country earned recognition in this category this year.

CSPA was founded in 1925 to support the scholastic publishing community, provide training for student journalists and advisers, and promote excellence in the field. The organization's Crown Awards honor top student publications among member schools. Judges consider overall excellence in a head-to-head comparison, weighing design, photography, concept, coverage, and writing. A total of 1,145 publications were eligible for judging this year.

At its Spring Convention in March, CSPA will announce which Crown Award Finalists have made it to the next level and will receive Gold Crown Awards. The hybrid magazine category was established just six years ago for publications that produce thematically cohesive print and digital components. A pioneer in this arena, Scroll + Scrolling has been a Crown Award Finalist and gone on to win a Gold Crown each year since the category's inception.

The 2018-2019 Scroll + Scrolling also earned Gold Medalist and All-Columbian honors in the publication's critique, a detailed evaluation based on a common set of standards that notes specific strengths and areas for growth. The school earned 970 out of 1,000 possible points.

"The conceptual development in both Scroll and Scrolling creates a visual and verbal 'whole book look,'" the judge wrote. "The writing and visuals are outstanding. Both the print and digital platforms are exemplary. Together they form an outstanding, cohesive, enriching experience for the reader... Judging your magazine was a joy."

CSPA also recognizes individual excellence in member publications via its Gold Circle Awards, and six Holton students just received these honors:

Sarah Muhlbaum '20
Certificate of Merit in Experimental Fiction
"The Mask" (2018-2019 magazine)

Michelle Jang '19
Certificate of Merit in Humor
"Teeth Grip, First Sip" (2018-2019 magazine)

Niki Abdala-Arata '18 & Zenia Choksy '18
Certificates of Merit for Photography Portfolio of Work (2017-2018 magazine)

Greer Knebel '18 & Rayne Layton '18
First Place for Interactive Graphic
"PUNCH" (2017-2018 magazine)

Second Place for Computer Generated Art/Illustration
"Junior Journeys" (2017-2018 magazine)

Congratulations to past and present Scroll + Scrolling staffers and contributors and longtime advisor Melinda Salata on this outstanding recognition! We look forward to another incredible year!

View the 2018-2019 Scroll + Scrolling:

View the 2017-2018 Scroll + Scrolling:

Throughout the fall season, Holton Athletic Association (HAA) recognized athletes for their outstanding achievements, efforts, and sportsmanship through our Panther of the Week program. Congratulations to the following athletes honored this fall. Below are their nominations from their respective coach.

	Clayton Forsythe '23 Varsity Tennis Clayton is a new freshman at Holton who joined the varsity tennis team in a her first attempt. She did not stop there as she climbed her way to the No. 1 doubles team and produced her first convincing varsity-level win against Visitation. She partnered with Julia Mehlman '21 to complete a perfect deconstruction of their opponents in a 10-2 win.
	Talia Desai '21 Varsity Field Hockey Talia, known as Tibby, gives 110% percent every day. She is one-of-a-kind. She is both fierce and aggressive with our opponents and kind and empathetic with her teammates. In our Holy Child game, we moved her to defense from her usual midfield position. Many players in her position would ask, "Why are you moving me?" Or doubt themselves in a new position. Tibby did not miss a beat. She dominated the whole second half as right back. She has faith in her team, coaches, and most importantly, herself. We admire so many things about Tibby and can't wait for her to be celebrated as Panther of the Week.
	Bella Motsco '21 Varsity Volleyball Bella Motsco is a very strong contributor to the team. As the libero, she is the defensive leader on the floor and is always ready to dig up hits and go after any ball that comes her way. Her defensive prowess definitely makes it difficult for opponents to get kills. She also has a strong serve that can lead to many aces, and she has run off a bunch of points for the team thus far. Her exciting play is one of the main reasons for our early success this season.
	Savannah Zachary '22 Cross Country Never having run competitively, Savannah Zachary joined the cross country team not knowing she would have to run up to five miles a day. Her determination to tackle and complete a workout without giving up has inspired the entire team. In return, they often rally around to encourage her, just to watch her fight even harder. Savannah is a dedicated runner who gives 100% effort on a daily basis. She has improved her endurance and confidence in her skills and abilities. She is an athlete who accepts all the challenges put before her this season. Savannah listens and follows advice from the coaches, and immediately applies the advice given to her. Her efforts have helped build her confidence to compete and we know that she will continue to push herself to that level. With her hard work and determination, her teammates have recognized Savannah as an inspiration and role model.
	Avery Simpson '23 Junior Varsity Soccer Avery is having a tremendous season thus far, creating havoc for opposing defenses while tirelessly working for the team up front. Avery's pace/quick change of direction is difficult to miss, but it's her determination that has separated her as a leader on and off the field. Avery's desire to learn and improve in her position has been fantastic to watch from a coaching perspective, whether it's asking questions before or after practice/games or helping and encouraging teammates through practices/games.
	Tomisin Sobande '22 Varsity Volleyball Tomisin, as both a setter and a hitter, makes a huge impact on our offense. When she is in the front row, she impresses with her high jumps and fast swing, generating a team-leading 33 kills in the season. When she goes to the back row, she gets nearly as many assists by setting the ball to the hot hand in the front. Tomisin also leads the team in aces, serving a hard ball that is difficult to return. If you've ever come to a volleyball game, you can see that Tomisin makes a difference with every touch on the ball.
	Kate Hallbach '22 Varsity Soccer Kate is slowly establishing herself as one of the best left backs in the ISL. She is extremely quick and reads how opposition teams want to break down her side with frightening closing speed. Along with her defensive prowess, she has an outstanding shot from distance that provides a great outlet for us when we play against teams that like to sit in and keep a lot of players behind the ball, which is becoming more and more common. We are excited about this sophomore talent and continuing to see her progress and dominate throughout the season.
	Erin Thomas '20 Cross Country As an outsider looking in, no one would ever guess that Erin Thomas was not one of the cross country team captains. Erin has been leading the team with her humor, inspiration, and motivation. Watching her work out or run in a meet, you can see her desire to improve and do her best. With tears in her eyes, Erin suffered a slight setback at one of our meets. The first sentence out of her mouth afterwards was, "I really wanted to finish the race." Erin has a true love for running, being a team member, and wearing blue and white for Holton. She is the embodiment of a leader; implanting a spark into the team, telling them they have nothing to give but their best at all times, and always setting a good example of a positive teammate. When the season ends, her teammates will remember her and how she was an inspiration.
	Dani Kane '21 Varsity Soccer Dani Kane represents all that is finest with our program, and is a leader by example in every aspect of the word. She is the first on the field to represent us in competition, as well as the first to console or protect one of her teammates when they need support. She never hides or deflects responsibility when things don't go as planned, but is always ready to celebrate one of her teammates when they rise to the challenge and help us succeed. Dani is a natural-born leader, and we are so excited to have one more year with her at the helm.
	Sammy London '21 Varsity Field Hockey The hardest, mentally and emotionally grueling, and most underrated position to play on any team is the back-up goalie. Not being in the starting line-up and continually putting forth all your effort shows more character, determination, guts, and discipline than is needed when you're fortunate enough to play all the time. Sammy has shown these traits. Our success as a field hockey program is only possible with people like Sammy, committing day after day. For this POTW, we would like you to pick the unsung hero, the true warrior, the perennial role player, Sammy London!

Congratulations to two Holton student-athletes for their commitment to compete in Division I athletics next year: Francesca Cetta '20 will run track and cross country at Duke University and Jillian Johnson '20 will swim at the University of Pennsylvania.

Learn more about each of these athletes and her journey here:

Francesca Cetta '20 – Duke University, Track & Field and Cross Country

After much success her junior year, Francesca had several options to continue her running career in college. Although she said it was difficult process ("like a roller coaster"), she knew she wanted the opportunity to compete at the next level and maximize her potential. While she considered other schools such as Harvard, Dartmouth and Columbia, Duke proved to be the best overall fit. Francesca says, "I chose Duke because of the environment, coaching, and spirit. Duke has a very energetic campus and team that I was immediately excited to be part of. The students at Duke are all super proud of the school and support Duke athletics. Coach Riley's coaching philosophy and vision for the program also best fit my goals as a runner. I am also super excited to run in the Duke forest and on other trails in North Carolina. I have also been a Duke fan since birth because both of my parents went there, so that helps!"

Francesca feels extremely prepared for the life as a Division I student-athlete. She says, "The challenging academics and busy schedule at Holton have taught me how to allocate my time with practice and class...I have learned how to focus on running when I am running and forget about school. I think separating the two makes for better practices and competitions."

Francesca wanted to acknowledge some of her coaches who have impacted her throughout her high school experience. "I want to thank Coach Valmon for being a mentor on and off the track, for believing in me, and for her unwavering support through the ups and downs; Coach Benson for her rigorous and methodical training plans; and Coach Braun and Coach Henderson for fostering my love for the sport and a supportive team environment."

Jillian Johnson '20 – University of Pennsylvania, Swimming

As the daughter of two Division I student-athletes, Jillian has known for a long time that she wanted to compete at the collegiate level. "Both instilled the belief in me that college athletics are a great source of friendship as well as competition at a higher level. My love for the sport and for continually improving played a huge role in my decision to continue swimming as well," says Jillian.

Throughout the process, Jillian made sure to consider schools for both their academic and athletic offerings. This led her to both Division I and III schools. During her junior year, things picked up for Jillian, as this is the first year colleges are officially allowed to contact swimmers. Jillian says, "The most difficult part of recruiting, I think, is keeping track of all of the people you are talking to and making sure you know exactly where you are with them as well as planning visits to get to know swimmers and coaches on each team. I recommend keeping a notebook or calendar of some sort to make it easier to visualize and plan for each school you're considering." Ultimately, Penn provided the best balance and opportunity for strong academics as well as intensive athletics.

Jillian is excited about the connection to Penn Medicine and access to many different types of classes that will help her in a future medical career and other non-STEM subjects that she loves just as much. Jillian feels well prepared for life as a student-athlete. "I believe that Holton has prepared me to think for myself and create my own ideas," she says. "It's also taught me how to manage difficult classes while participating in intensive athletics."

They say it takes a village, and Jillian recognizes that so many different groups of people have helped her along her journey. These include her parents, "who helped me through this confusing and difficult process and who have provided me with endless support throughout my life as a student-athlete; her coaches, "who have undoubtedly improved my swimming and mental strength and who have certainly prepared me for the next chapter of my athletic career"; and her friends and teammates, "for all their encouragement and support in the pool and out of the pool."

By the time you read this, we will have hosted Lisa Damour, Ph.D. on Wed., Nov. 13. For those of you not familiar with Damour, she is a psychologist who specializes in girls. She serves as Executive Director of the Center for Research on Girls at Laurel School, a girls school in Shaker Heights, Ohio, as well as having a private counseling practice and being the bestselling author of Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood and now Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls. Deeply immersed in our girls' lives, she sheds important light on the issues they face and offers excellent advice on how to support them. She is also an engaging, informative, and sympathetic speaker. Although some of you will have heard her speak and/or read Under Pressure, I find her work so compelling that I want to share some of what I find most enthralling.

Many aspects of an upper-middle class, educated culture contribute to stress among the young people within it, a fact that psychologist Madeline Levine posited as early as 2006 in her book, The Price of Privilege. Sonya Luthar, a psychology professor at Arizona State, has added to our understanding of the pressures that many young people in affluent communities can feel. As a recent Washington Post article explained, these pressures have prompted researchers at the National Academies of Sciences, Engineering and Medicine to label young people in high-achieving schools "at-risk," alongside those living in poverty or foster care, who recently immigrated, or who have an incarcerated parent. The article notes, "It may seem counterintuitive...to put relatively affluent kids in the same category as our country's most vulnerable youths. While the stressors are markedly different, researchers are finding that both are 'at risk' for elevated levels of chronic stress that can affect health and well-being."

The pressures of this affluent environment include a preoccupation with achievement, especially associated with selective college admissions—something that led to the behavior uncovered in last year's national college admissions scandal. Such parental emphasis absent a prioritization of character traits proves particularly deleterious for young people. Social media adds another dimension, as our children labor daily under the pressure to curate their lives to attract the maximum number of likes; as they deal with FOMO (fear of missing out) because they constantly know what their peers are doing, including activities from which they may have been excluded; as they navigate hostile online environments where they might experience bullying, sexism, racism, homophobia, and anti-Semitism and anti-Muslimism. Girls, in particular, live with expectations to be perfect—perfect students, perfect athletes, perfect looking—all the while, making it look easy. If we are over 30, these factors make for a different adolescent experience than ours.

The data indeed suggest that young people, especially girls, are experiencing stress, anxiety, and depression at greater levels than in the past. Damour cites a study that found a 55 percent increase in the number of girls reporting that they often feel "nervous, worried, or fearful" between 2009 and 2014 (xvii). Incidence of depression increased from 13 to 17 percent among adolescent girls between 2005 and 2014. Moreover, girls are more susceptible to all these issues than boys.

Stress and anxiety are distinct feelings. Stress is defined as emotional or mental strain or tension, while anxiety represents feelings of "fear, dread, or panic" (11). They are often closely tied to one another and they both exist as part of our emotional spectrum for good reason. Both are also inevitable parts of life. Stress generally falls into three areas: life events, daily hassles, and chronic stress. Change causes stress, and even happy life events such as getting married or having a baby bring with them associated stress—as do, obviously, unhappy events such as the death of a loved one. Daily hassles are very different; they are the things we have to do all the time that can be annoying or time-consuming and probably not especially rewarding. Shopping, cooking, laundry, and commuting would fall into this category; for students, much of the homework they have to do might qualify. Most of the time, these types of responsibilities don't cause undue stress. However, if a life event such as a family member getting sick occurs, these daily hassles can become stressful. Chronic stress happens when life is constantly difficult–dealing with long-term financial difficulties or poverty, living in a dangerous neighborhood, caring for a severely ill relative.

I deeply believe that learning to manage stress represents one of the most important skills we can give our girls. They all experience stress as adolescents, and they will continue to do so as adults. Understanding its positive and negative aspects and knowing how to manage it will be key to their success, both personal and professional. First, and perhaps most importantly in the world in which we live, we need to emphasize to our girls that not all stress is bad. In fact, stress serves as an important motivator. We don't learn without a certain amount of stress. We talk to our students a lot about how we learn when we are in our stretch zones, and stretch zones are inherently stressful. School by necessity involves stress because it pushes students to learn new things. It's critically important that we help our girls recognize this healthy stress. Research shows that when we see stress as a positive emotion, we feel better and perform better, including in the context of school. Damour uses the analogy of strength training. We get stronger by gradually increasing the weight we lift and the number of repetitions. It is the stress on our muscles caused by the increased weight that makes us grow stronger. Schoolwork should be like that: increasing in difficulty as students progress, because that is how they grow and learn. It's also important to remember that successful strength training involves resting. Our muscles need time to rest and rebuild; likewise, our girls need to take breaks from their work. Unrelenting work is inefficient and uncreative. We need to step away, reflect, and recharge.

Understanding and recognizing the three stress domains, daily hassles, life events, and chronic stress, will help our girls manage their stress. In general, schoolwork-related stress should fall into the daily hassles domain and should be manageable. However, those of us who work with young people know that life events in a family affect children and can exacerbate the daily hassles to the point of adding to stress. Chronic stress can also come in the form of home-life burdened with conflict, ongoing financial challenges, or illness. Girls may view school as a refuge from the family difficulty and we try to make it so. Some students will deal with the stress and anxiety by throwing themselves into their work—that's what my niece did while her mother was dying of cancer. Other students won't have the emotional and mental bandwidth to focus on school. Regardless of how they respond, getting our students (and ourselves) help during life events (and convincing our girls to accept it) can make all the difference.

As parents, we also need to recognize that our expectations for achievement, the kind of pressure Luthar and other researchers have identified as so harmful, could easily create chronic stress in our children. Likewise, imposing those expectations on themselves could cause chronic stress for young people. For this kind of stress, psychologists tell us to accept what we cannot change and then find distractions. Acceptance frees us up emotionally to find other outlets. Whatever kind of stress our daughters are dealing with, exercise constitutes one of the most effective management tactics.

We need to help ourselves and our girls distinguish between normal and even advantageous stress and unhealthy stress levels. We need to remember that we don't learn and grow without it. We need to help them to learn to manage stress in its various forms. Finally, we need to be mindful of how we may be contributing to their stress.

Open article in a new window

The fall sports seasons came to a close on Tues., Nov. 12 as the teams gathered for the annual Fall Sports Banquet. Five athletes were inducted into the Holton Athletic Association (HAA) and select members of Holton's fall sports teams were recognized with awards. HAA president Isabelle Wilson '20 welcomed the new members into Holton's oldest club: Eliza Gichner '20, Jenna Mohi-ud-din '20, Sydney Pham '20, Klara Schmidt '20, and Bella Motsco '21.

This was one of the most successful fall seasons in a long time! Highlights include two championship performances by varsity cross country! In addition to many top placement, every team was able to host their first round of games during the playoffs! After winning in the ISL A Division last year, volleyball had a impressive season, finishing third in the top AA division! Field hockey made a run at the title after beating St. Stephen's/St. Agnes in overtime! Soccer and tennis also had strong regular seasons and lost by small margins during the tournament. A record number of athletes received ISL honors.

Awards for Most Valuable, Most Improved, and Coach's Award were presented to athletes in varsity cross country, JV & varsity field hockey, JV & varsity soccer, JV & varsity tennis, and JV & varsity volleyball. Congratulations to all teams for a very successful fall. Go Panthers!

Cross Country
Head Coach: Carrie Braun
2019 ISL Champions
2019 MD State Private School Champions
Most Valuable Runner: Francesca Cetta '20
Most Improved Runner: Klara Schmidt '20
Coaches Award: Erin Thomas '20

All- ISL Honors
Francesca Cetta '20
Natalie DeSarbo '21
Lusya Engen '21

ISL Championship Team:
Francesca Cetta '20
Natalie DeSarbo '21
Lusya Engen '21
Robin Hess '22
Shifra Eskin '20
Klara Schmidt '20

All-County Honors:
Francesca Cetta '20
Natalie DeSarbo '21
Lusya Engen '21
Robin Hess '22

All-State Honors:
Francesca Cetta '20
Natalie DeSarbo '21
Lusya Engen '21
Robin Hess '22
Shifra Eskin '20

MD State Championship Team:
Francesca Cetta '20
Natalie DeSarbo '21
Lusya Engen '21
Robin Hess '22
Shifra Eskin '20
Natalia Szalay '20
Klara Schmidt '20

Varsity Field Hockey
Head Coach: Katie McEnroe
Most Valuable Player: Eliza Gichner '20
Most Improved Player: Serena Hong '22
"Left it on the Field" Award: Abby Manderfield '20

ISL Honors
Sophie Whiteway '20
Katie Kohn '21
Eliza Gichner '20

JV Field Hockey
Head Coaches: Whitney Groseclose
Most Valuable Player: Madeline Feldner '23
Most Improved Player: Alex Finch '23
Coaches Award: Kate McManaman '23

Varsity Soccer
Head Coach: Ben Ferry
Most Valuable Player: Dani Kane
Most Improved Player: Kate Hallbach
Coaches Award: Maya Valmon

ISL A Honors
Dani Kane '21
Alexandra Zupnik '23

JV Soccer
Head Coach: Kahlil Lam
Most Valuable Player: Cate Goodin '22
Most Improved Player: Avery Simpson '23
Coaches Award: Emme Pastor '22

Varsity Tennis
Head Coach: Yann Auzoux
Most Valuable Players: Greta Hannam '20
Most Improved Player: Clayton Forsythe '23
Coaches Award: Brooke Evans '20

ISL AA Honors
Brooke Evans '20
Shira Studley '20

JV Tennis
Head Coach: Lester Chavez
Most Valuable Player: Romi Hodor '21
Most Improved Player: Alden Bradley '23
Coaches Award: Amelie Kerry '23

Varsity Volleyball
Head Coach: Megan Locke
Most Valuable Player: Tomisin Sobande '22 & Bella Motsco '21
Most Improved Player: Huntly Rathbone '21

ISL AA Honors
Tomisin Sobande '22
Bella Motsco '21

JV Volleyball
Head Coach: Bill Locke
Most Valuable Player: Elizabeth Lugar '22
Most Improved Player: Alaris Seraile '23
Coaches Award: Tali Smith '22

Welcome to our Thanksgiving Assembly. I want to begin by thanking all of you, students, faculty and staff who contributed to the 98 Thanksgiving baskets, several extra bags of food, and more than $2,460 in gift cards that we donated to Community Reach of Montgomery County. Many families, who might otherwise have been unable to do so, will enjoy a bountiful Thanksgiving thanks to your generosity.

Thanksgiving means food–turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, and any number of other foods that may be traditions in your family. It's also about the gathering of family and friends and about taking time from our busy lives to be thankful. This afternoon, I am going to talk about thanking, because it is appropriate to the occasion and because for the second year, our Upper School student leaders chose gratitude as their adaptive challenge for the year.

As a whole, you are good about saying "thank you." I hear you in the dining room; I notice it when you offer thanks at the end of a class and when I receive a thank-you note for attending a performance, chaperoning a dance, or being interviewed. Today, I want to encourage you to think more deeply about why you are grateful–do more than go through the motions–and express those reasons to others.

To help you do this, I will try to model it by sharing some of the many aspects of Holton for which I am grateful. I have many, many reasons for gratitude related to Holton, more than I have time to share at an assembly, so please understand that this cannot be an exhaustive list.

I am grateful for our facilities, which offer you excellent learning environments. Our well-maintained athletic facilities give our student-athletes a base from which to perform your best. The track field, track, and pool are among the best in the area. Likewise, our classrooms, especially the science classrooms, are designed for optimal learning. The recent renovation of the Lower School created spaces with increased and better light that enhances learning. This theater's renovation a few years ago made it more comfortable and improved its already excellent acoustics. I'm also grateful for the amphitheater; I love the dappled light coming through the trees and the stream flowing along its edge. I'm grateful that we have this special place where we mark some of our most significant milestones. I am also grateful for the campus' beautiful landscaping, most recently enjoying the brilliant fall leaves. This kind of natural beauty soothes and uplifts us.

I'm grateful for the breakfast and lunch we are provided daily. It is both tasty and offers choice to satisfy virtually every palate. Lunch is something to look forward to, not just as a break in the day, but as an enjoyable experience, and even sometimes as an opportunity to try something new. Perhaps most important is the fellowship that happens in the dining room. Friends eat together and friendships grow at assigned tables. In the morning, friends and families share breakfast, starting the day in community.

I think breakfast has probably become a Holton tradition. We treasure our traditions, and I, like many of you, are grateful for those traditions–this annual assembly, Convocation, and our all-school collaborations. These times when we come together as a whole School bind us, while connecting us to our century-plus history. Traditions give us a sense of rootedness, of connection, and help define where we fit in our worlds.

Without question, however, what makes Holton so special and the part for which I am most grateful is the people. I am grateful for all the people who clean and maintain our facilities, inside and outside. I am grateful for the people who keep us safe, because without feeling safe, no one would be able to teach or learn effectively. I am grateful for the people who make and serve our meals. I am grateful for all the people who help this institution run: administrative assistants, the Business Office, the Advancement Office, the Communications Office, the Admissions Office, and the IT Department. While those folks may not work directly with students, the School would not operate as smoothly or have the excellent resources and reputation it has without them. For that, I am grateful. I am, of course, grateful for the faculty–teachers, coaches, directors, and administrators. I am grateful that these people, with whom you students interact daily, are deeply committed to your growth as students and as people. That commitment drives them constantly to be thinking how best to help you, collectively and individually, acquire knowledge, skills, and habits of mind; contemplate big questions; develop perspectives; and strengthen your self-confidence while providing experiences that help you build your own identities in the context of an ever-widening community, preparing you for your futures, at the next level of school and, most importantly, for life. They look for ways to spark your interests and feed your passions, whether that might be helping to turn you into a budding scientist, a lover of literature, a linguist, mathematician or historian; they might be helping to hone your athletic skills and your teamwork through a sport or participation in an arts ensemble; they might be spurring your talents as a writer, a musician, a singer, an actor, or a dancer. While most of you will not pursue any of these activities as careers, I am grateful that your education builds a foundation for lifelong learning, for living a rich and fulfilling life, for effective citizenship of this country and the world, and for leadership, however you choose to make an impact. As you well know, the adults here at School do this very well, conscientiously and professionally, with deep care. I am grateful for those qualities and all their work on your behalf as they encourage you to reach your potential.

Finally, I am grateful for all of you, our students. You are interesting, creative, inspiring, fun, thoughtful, intelligent, and caring. I am grateful for the opportunity to teach you in Global Perspectives or on Colonial Day, to be a HARP leader, help with a Middle School club, and serve as an Advisor; each of these opportunities allows me to get to know some of you better and to play a small role in your education. I'm grateful for your musical and theatrical talents–talents we've seen so impressively in the last few weeks with the Cathedral Choral Concert, Chicago, and Much Ado About Nothing. You entertain and inspire us. I'm grateful for your artwork that awes me year after year; I'm grateful for its beauty, for how it provokes, and the opportunities it offers you to explore the world through different media. I am grateful for the opportunity to share in the glory of winning, whether it's an award, a game, or a championship–shout out to Cross Country for their historic season and to Scroll + Scrolling for another Columbia Scholastic Press Association Gold Award. I'm grateful when you have experiences that broaden your horizons and push you out of your comfort zones, as it is through these opportunities that you learn the most. I'm especially grateful when I observe you demonstrating fortitude and perseverance, coming from behind, pushing yourselves to the end of a competition, or tackling a tough challenge, as these are qualities that will serve you well in life.

I'm grateful when I see you exercising leadership such as organizing HAMUN or putting out Scribbler; when Honor Council deliberates a disciplinary case; when you work for a cause you care about, such as breast cancer research. Through these activities, you learn a range of important skills. I'm especially grateful when you take on an issue and work to raise community awareness. The fourth graders, for example, are committed to the environment and thanks to their leadership, we will spend a day this spring without electricity. The BSU girls have been sharing their experiences as black students at Holton with the faculty. Other students have organized programs around mental health. These kinds of activism take courage and make Holton a better place, for which I'm grateful.

Holton is not perfect–no institution is, but it is, nonetheless, a very special place. Although my job is not always easy, I do know, every single day, that I have countless reasons to be grateful for being part of this community and for playing a part in shaping the future through the education of you, our students, people whom I am thankful to be able to believe will make the world a better place.

Open article in a new window

Telemundo D.C. Bureau Chief Lori Montenegro made time in her extremely busy day last Thursday, Dec. 12, to speak to Upper School students about her long career in journalism, lessons learned along the way, and her advice for young women.

Montenegro began her talk by recounting her own high school days, when a passionate journalism teacher helped spark what eventually would become a lifelong interest in news and storytelling. She landed her first job in the field while still in college—an interview she was told to attend "for practice" and never expected to land.

After this first gig, Montenegro never looked back, advancing through a host of journalistic roles with the United States Information Agency, Univision, and eventually Telemundo, which she calls "her home." She served as Noticias Telemundo's D.C. correspondent for more than 12 years before being appointed the network's D.C. Bureau Chief this past February.

Today, Montenegro is one of the most influential and experienced journalists in Spanish-language television. She told students that as a Cuban immigrant and coming from a family with little formal education, she did not anticipate her current level of success and access.

"Every time I get to walk through the gates of the White House, I can't believe I get to do this," she said. "I always think of that and am so grateful."

When asked if she's faced any career obstacles because she's a woman, Montenegro said no, but noted she's encountered racial biases. She believes that diversity in the workplace (and elsewhere) is critical to eradicating stereotypes and bias, because then thinking is based not on abstract ideas and misconceptions, but rather "on interactions and how we are actually treated by people."

"Don't allow anyone to tell you that you can't," she said.

Among Montenegro's other advice for students was to read a lot from many different sources, to stay engaged in the political process and vote, to remain open-minded, to travel and try to interact with people from many different backgrounds and cultures, and to really listen.

"We have lost the art of compromise," she said. "By really listening to others, particularly those who have different views, you may be able to learn something, or maybe help them see why their perspective is not practical."

When asked about her favorite or most impactful interview, Montenegro recalled how after 9/11 she spoke with a Pentagon employee who'd received burns to over 70 percent of his body. "What struck me so much was that at no time was he bitter," she said. "He didn't complain; he was just thinking about what he was going to do with his life, with his second chance."

Montenegro said that the interview made her reflect on her own outlook and attitudes. Now, she said, "When somebody asks me how I'm doing, I'm not going to complain... My goal is to make other people smile."

Marine geologist Chris Symons, Ph.D. took Lower School students on a fascinating underwater tour of sorts during Gathering this Monday, Dec. 16. Through photos, maps, and anecdotes, she presented highlights from her long, accomplished career, which has focused largely on mapping the seafloor. Among her many credits, she served as a science coordinator for the DEEPSEA CHALLENGE project, which saw producer James Cameron make a historic solo dive down to the deepest part of our oceans in the Mariana Trench.

Symons said she always loved nature as a youngster and followed her passions eventually into geology, then marine science. She told students that contrary to what many might think, we actually have better maps of the moon and even Mars than our own planet; so far, we have mapped less than a third of our own ocean floor, something she and her fellow researchers are working hard to change.

"I'm part of the Seabed 2030 Project, and we would like to map the whole world's oceans by 2030," she said.

Symons recounted her travels on research vessels and in submersibles. She also discussed notable females in STEM that have impacted her work, including astronaut Sally Ride and early oceanographic cartographer Marie Tharp, a name not readily known but whose influential work is still used to this day.

Following a lively Q&A session, Symons met with fifth graders about being a woman scientist, and with sixth graders about moons of other planets. (Symons is the aunt of Jacqueline '27.)

Learn more about Holton's commitment to STEM education for women.

In the Washington Post's recent announcement of fall 2019 All-Mets, Sophie Whiteway '20 was named to the Second Team for field hockey. This is the first time in over 10 years that a Holton field hockey player has earned this distinction.

Sophie played a significant role in helping the team advance to the ISL Championship game. She scored 25 goals in the season, netting a hat trick in six different games. The senior captain was a four-year starter on varsity, receiving ISL honors since her sophomore year. Head Coach Katie McEnroe says, "Since preseason, Sophie truly believed we could be champions. She was an important leader for us. Her ability to take on players one-on-one with confidence and composure was a difference maker for us."

Congratulations Sophie and the varsity field hockey team for an amazing season!

Sinclair Daniel '15 just graduated from NYU's Tisch School of the Arts last spring, and her acting career is already soaring—literally. She's currently starring as the high-flying Wendy in the Shakespeare Theatre Company production of Peter Pan and Wendy, a "woke," feminist twist on the classic tale.

In between her performances, auditions, and all the other things on her very full plate, Daniel took time on Thurs., Jan. 9 to speak with Upper School students about her experiences and share advice with Holton performers.

Like many in her audience, Daniel gained early stage experience in Holton and Landon's theaters. (She attended Holton for grades 7-10, when her family moved out of the area). A favorite production was Anything Goes—"I still sing the songs like twice a week," she laughed.

When looking at colleges and careers, Daniel says, "I always knew that theater was the thing I wanted to do." At NYU's prestigious Tisch School of the Arts, she built her network, her craft, and her range, studying everything from theater to TV and film, from Shakespeare to experimental theater.

Daniel said her teachers, skilled and caring but also demanding and sometimes brutally honest, really helped prepare her for real-world auditions. "Rejection is part of it," she said. "The earlier you can realize it's not personal, the better."

A friend once told her a useful stat: You get one callback for every 60 auditions. "I don't know if it's true," Daniel said, "but it helps me put things into perspective... Maybe this is only audition number nine and it's fine, and by time I've gotten to audition 30, I don't even think about it because it's just routine."

Landing a gig, she said, is "preparation meets opportunity"—an intersection at which she found herself just a few months after graduating from college. An actor had just dropped out of the Shakespeare Theatre's upcoming production, and a former acting agent who was a fan of Daniel's work helped her land an audition.

The actress loves the D.C.-based show and is immensely grateful for the opportunity. "The show has a lot of people like me in it...we're kind of in the same in-between phase, and we're just having a lot of fun."

The production closes this Sunday and Daniel has been busy exploring what might come next. She's not sure of any details yet, but she's confident that other doors will open.

Her advice for Holton's performers? "If you want to do theater, do theater. Just audition... If you stay with it long enough, I firmly believe something will happen."

Sinclair Daniel '15 in the 2012 Holton/Landon production of Pride and Prejudice (left) and the Shakespeare Theatre Company's Peter Pan and Wendy, closing Sunday (right).

Homework. Students, teacher, parents—we all care about homework.

To me, homework serves a range of important purposes. I count as homework all the schoolwork done outside of class-time, including reading (the kind of reading for pleasure expected of Lower School students) and studying for assessments. Homework provides an opportunity to practice a skill or a concept; this is particularly true for math and some science courses (such as physics and chemistry), as well as for world language study through level three. In history and biology, students learn content, both facts and concepts, by reading texts, while in English, reading literature lies at the heart of that discipline. One could simply lecture in history and biology, but students wouldn't learn the material with the same depth; moreover, solely lecturing and reading during class would limit opportunities for discussion-based activities. It is hard to imagine an English class where one didn't read in preparation for class discussion. This is also true in higher-level language classes, where reading in the target language constitutes a key skill students should master and where advance reading informs classwork. Writing represents another important type of homework, whether preparing a lab report, writing an English essay or a research paper, or writing in world language class where, again, writing in the target language represents a key skill to be mastered. Students can write in class and are frequently asked to do so. However, good writing grows from the revision process, a process done best over time with breaks between rewrites. A quality education, especially in the humanities, depends on homework.

That said, too much homework becomes self-defeating. When students feel overwhelmed, they cannot learn effectively and any joy of learning evaporates. In addition, schools and individual students shouldn't measure "rigor" and their worth—how "good" they are—by homework quantity. Like many things in life, quality outranks quantity in determining homework's value.

Over the past several years at Holton, we have worked to address what we recognized as homework issues. In Lower School, we now follow the guideline of the grade level multiplied by 10 as the appropriate amount of time students should spend doing homework (in other words, a fifth grader should do 50 minutes of homework), plus 20 minutes reading. We have smoothed out the transition between sixth and seventh grade so that seventh graders no longer feel slammed as they enter Middle School. In Upper School, teachers have reduced the amount of homework they assign, a fact that students have acknowledged in the past couple of years.

However, under the new schedule this year, Upper School classes meet more often (six out of every eight days instead of four out of every six) and students are more likely to have classes meet two days in a row. We were aware of this change and teachers have adjusted their assignments accordingly. However, to some students at least, it feels like more homework. Responding to these concerns, we conducted a homework survey among Upper School students. The survey tells us that we have some work to do in ensuring that students understand the purpose of their homework. We also learned that time spent on homework proved to be generally about what we would expect. Juniors do appear to be an exception as they do, on average, about 3-4 hours of homework a night; however, they also spend a fair amount of time doing homework at School as well, pushing the total higher than we probably want.

Given that teachers are assigning less than in the past and that students, especially juniors, are still spending quite a lot of time doing homework, we need to address the homework issue from another angle. Here, I would strongly recommend that we turn to advice from Dr. Lisa Damour, advice she shares in her book Under Pressure and that she talked about with faculty, administrators, parents, and student leaders when she visited Holton last November.

Two characteristics girls frequently exhibit can contribute to homework overload: perfectionism and a desire to please (in this case their teachers). Perfectionism leads girls to do more work than may be necessary, including such unnecessary activities as rewriting notes in different colors and making study guides "pretty." Damour encourages us to encourage our daughters to behave more like our sons and be tactical about their schoolwork, an approach that will make them more efficient. Boys are much more likely than girls to determine what they need to do—and no more—in order to achieve the grade they want. This means thinking both about what one needs to do and, importantly, what one does NOT need to do. This is a critical skill that will serve girls well in college and in life.

I can hear parents (and teachers) as well as girls say, "But doesn't that mean I'm not giving it my best? Shouldn't I do everything I'm assigned at a level of excellence? Aren't you suggesting that I shortchange my learning?" No, no, and no. Girls will still learn plenty with this approach and do so with less stress, while probably leaving themselves more time to engage in activities that are also valuable and affirming, such as spending time with friends or family. With less stress, they may also learn better since high levels of stress impede learning. If a girl is truly passionate about a subject and genuinely enjoys the process of learning about it, she should certainly pursue it as much as she likes. But that kind of passion leads to more reading and deeper learning, not rewriting notes.

To this end, we can help girls be more efficient in their studying in many subjects by encouraging them to use the online quizzes associated with their textbooks or others they find on the internet. Ascertaining their knowledge level allows them to suspend studying what they already know and concentrate on areas they still need to learn. Obviously, this won't work completely—in history, for example, you don't just need to know the facts but also how you use them to construct an argument. However, it is a good start towards greater efficiency.

This approach is especially important advice for girls who feel anxious about tests. They find that studying reduces their anxiety, which is logical, but then they keep studying beyond what is necessary. The law of diminishing returns applies to studying, and we need to help girls gain confidence in their knowledge and skills and learn when to let go and stop studying.

This leads us to the second concerning characteristic: the desire to please. We in schools act as though girls should love every subject equally. Really? Did any of us, even those of us who became teachers, love every subject we took equally? No. We need to give girls the freedom to admit that some subjects interest them more than others. Admitting this allows them to ease up on some subjects while directing their energies to those they enjoy. Middle school, when grades don't appear on transcripts, is a good time for girls to experiment with ways to be more efficient while maintaining their performance goals. They will need to adjust as the nature of work shifts in upper school, but they can establish good habits in middle school.

Certainly, some girls do not do enough work. Holton is a school, however, where our students generally are "all in." They work hard and are proud of it. I am much more concerned about the girls doing too much than not enough because I think we have way more of them. Indeed, Damour asked our girls if they ever do more work than they need to. Their answer? Yes. We need to help them change that answer to no.

Continuing my discussion of Lisa Damour's book Under Pressure, this week I will focus on anxiety. The data shows that both stress and anxiety are increasing among young people, more among girls than boys. One study Damour cites found that 31% of girls and young women experience anxiety (as opposed to only 13% of their male counterparts). (xvii) The research shows that, unquestionably, some people suffer from anxiety disorders, conditions when anxiety "becomes so pervasive or potent as to spoil daily life."(27) Professionals can treat anxiety disorders very effectively, and should you think your daughter is suffering from out-of-proportion anxiety, please seek professional help. At the same time, as with stress, we need to help girls recognize that with life comes some degree of anxiety and help them manage it.

While stress is primarily an emotional feeling, the physical feelings of dread or panic define anxiety. These feelings obviously have an evolutionary purpose of protecting us from danger. We experience physical reactions like rapid heartbeat and shallow breathing that help us focus on the threat. While most of the threats that trigger our anxiety today are not life-threatening, we should still pay attention to these reactions. For example, being anxious about an upcoming test is signaling us to study. At the same time, anxiety can interfere with the very steps we need to take—such as studying, in this case—to respond to the danger. We can help our girls manage their anxiety by encouraging them to do deep breathing exercises and practice mindfulness. As your daughter engages in these simple exercises, she calms her breathing and heartbeat and is able to focus on the task at hand instead of feeling propelled by instinctive "fight or flight."

Being anxious can tempt us to avoid the source of our anxiety. A girl feeling anxious about a test may come up with a reason not to go to school and immediately feels better. As parents, we may watch her suffering and, not wanting exacerbate it, support her not going to school. However, avoiding her test is the worst thing she or we could do because, over time, enabling avoidance can produce "full-blown phobias."(34) Instead, we want our daughters to engage in "graduated exposure," making them face their fears in small doses. Go to school, but don't take the test; go to school, sit in the classroom, but don't take the test. Go to the performance and sit in the wings instead of getting on stage. You get the idea. The only way to overcome anxiety is to face our fears; as parents we need to help our daughters do that even when they resist us.

While we need to help them face their fears, using reassurance will backfire. Telling them that everything is going to be fine invalidates our daughter's feelings and makes us seem dismissive and unsympathetic, pushing them deeper into their emotional maelstrom and reinforcing the age-old adolescent condition of feeling misunderstood. Instead, we need to respond in ways that demonstrate that we take their concerns seriously (even when they seem ridiculous). As Damour observes, "The stuff of life can be divided into three categories: things we like, things we can handle, and things that constitute a crisis...when children and young people become upset, they can forget about the middle category."(43) It is our job to help them realize that most situations fall into the "things we can handle category." Damour suggests "stinks" and "handle." Acknowledge that a situation is indeed lousy (it stinks); have her identify the worst-case scenario and help her strategize about how she might handle even those circumstances. In this way, you acknowledge her concerns and help her gain some sense of control, all of which will help her calm down. Please do not engage in these kinds of conversations via text. We need to have these conversations face-to-face where we can control tone and allow the exploration of the issue to unfold in a calm environment (perhaps with a cup of tea).

We all know that girls' social relationships can engender stress and anxiety. Indeed, all girls at some point will experience uncomfortable if not hurtful social interactions. Social media has significantly increased the likelihood that this will happen and can amplify the experiences when they do.

Damour describes the three ways most people deal with hurtful behavior:

A bulldozer deals with disagreements by running people over, while doormats allow themselves to be run over. The doormat with spikes employs passive-aggressive tactics, such as using guilt as a weapon, playing the part of the victim, or involving third parties in what should be one-on-one disagreements. (75)

Instead of choosing from these alternatives, we can help them act as a "pillar," someone who "stands up for [oneself] without stepping on anyone else."(75) This approach allows girls to feel honest in their dealings without expanding the conflict. Being a pillar takes guidance, working through scenarios with your daughter. It's helpful to encourage them to approach situations understanding that they may not know the full story and find ways to address issues while minimizing a defensive reaction on the other person's part. It's critical that these conversations happen in person and that the girl practices tone, because that will make all the difference.

Adolescent girls have always struggled with their peer relationships. In more recent times, we have added an expectation of honesty that adds an additional layer of challenge. As Damour says,

More than we realize, girls understand us to be saying that they must always be utterly and completely forthright. That's a problem, especially when we combine it with the cultural injunction to be agreeable. (190)

For girls, who live in intensely relational worlds, the perceived demand that they always be truthful can engender stress if not outright anxiety. It can lead to being a bulldozer, a generally ineffective approach to conflict if maintaining a relationship is the goal. Moreover, none of us would expect to feel positively about everyone around us, nor would we consider saying what we truly think all the time. Indeed, contemplating doing so makes me anxious!

We need to help our girls understand that we don't expect constant transparency. Society—as well as their own relationships and self-esteem—depends on people monitoring the expression of their feelings. Girls inherently understand this, which is part of why they feel conflicted about being honest. Damour encourages us to think about the front and back stages of their lives. On the front stage (in public outside their most intimate circles of family and friends), they do need to be polite and considerate, which may mean not expressing their full selves. At home (and possibly in the company of a small group of friends, as long as it doesn't spill out into a larger group), backstage, they can and should express their annoyances, frustrations, etc. Damour calls it being "brain annoyed" and "behavior polite."

Likewise, just as we have somehow convinced our girls that they need to be wholly forthright, we also tend to tell them that they have to address every transgression. We are trying to mold them into strong young women who can stand up for themselves. However, it's unrealistic, not entirely fair, and not even practical to have them address every slight. We need to help them prioritize their relationships and decide which ones deserve the energy it takes to have these kinds of conversations; the rest they should let slide. Just like learning how to have backstage and frontstage personas, learning to do this will help ease stress and anxiety.

We need to acknowledge the stress and anxiety that are normal parts of our daughters' lives and then work with empathy to help them dial down. Learning to do this will help them now and prepare them for adulthood.

If you'd like to continue delving into Under Pressure and discuss these topics with fellow parents, we hope you will join us on Feb. 27 from 8-9:30 a.m. in the Simms Reception Room for a Parent Partnership Program coffee with our Student-Centered Support Team. Please see our Jan. 30, 2020 Holton Highlights for full event details, RSVP information, and how to get a copy of the book.

Open article in a new window

Holton athletes are swimming and running faster than ever! Both the winter track and swim & dive teams have had record-breaking performances this year. Winter track set three new records, while swim & dive set two, plus a number of nationally recognized performances.

Darya Alimoradi '23 set the school record in the One Mile Racewalk, with a time of 12:41. Marley Kurey '23, Billi Hall '23, Arielle Troadec '23, and Avery Simpson '23 broke the school record for the 4x200 meter relay with a new time of 1:49.79. Marley, Arielle, Avery and Lusya Engen '21 broke the school record for the 1600 Sprint Medley Relay with a new time of 4:41.92, breaking the previous record by 30 seconds!

If you want to catch a glimpse of these girls in action, be sure to come by the Montgomery County Championship Meet Wed., Feb. 5 starting at 4 p.m. at Georgetown Prep.

In the pool during the Independent School League (ISL) Championship, Sophie Duncan '22 broke the 500 free record with an automatic All-American time of 4:51.71. Teammate Ella Myers '22's 500 free time is an All-American consideration time.

This past weekend at the Washington Metropolitan Prep School Swimming and Diving League (WMPSSDL) Championship, Sophie Duncan '22 set a new school record in the 200 IM with an automatic All-American time of 1:59.56. Joyce Wu '23 (100 Breast) set a new school record with an All-American consideration time of 1:03.78. Teammate Jillian Johnson '20 (100 Fly) also placed first at the meet with an All-American consideration time. The first-place 400 Freestyle relay team (Courtney Watts '23, Duncan, Myers, and Tatum Zupnik '20) also finished with an All-American consideration time.

Be sure to come cheer on the Panthers at the METRO Swim and Dive Championships this weekend at the Germantown Swim Center and come out to Holton on Tues., Feb. 11, at 4 p.m. for the final swim meet of the year against Paul VI High School!

Congratulations to the varsity swimming & diving team for bringing home another WMPSSDL Championship! Over the weekend, the team participated in the Washington Metropolitan Prep School Swimming and Diving League (WMPSSDL) Championship and finished with a 545-point victory! Upping their score from last year by 29 points, the Panthers were 363 points in front of the second-place finisher!

In the past eight years Holton has won this event seven times, including the last four in a row! In addition to winning the championship, Holton finished first in eight events. Sophie Duncan '22 set a new school record in the 200 IM with an automatic All-American time of 1:59.56. Other first-place finishes came from Tatum Zupnik '20 (50 Free), Ella Myers '22 (500 Free), and All-American consideration times from Jillian Johnson '20 (100 Fly) and Joyce Wu '23 (100 Breast), who also set a new school record of 1:03.78.

Holton's relay teams put up big numbers with wins in all three relay events: the 200 Medley (Johnson, Rachel Blackwell '20, Wu, and Valerie Mello '21), 200 Freestyle (Courtney Watts '23, Duncan, Tatum Zupnik '20, and Myers), and 400 Freestyle (Watts, Duncan, Myers, and Zupnik), which also finished with an All-American consideration time.

Coach Westerberg commented, "I am proud of the way our team responded this weekend. We had so much fun and it was great to see all of the fast swimming. I am happy for the kids. They deserve it; they work so hard day in and day out."

For more coverage of the win, check out the story in The Washington Post. Click here to check out the varsity swimming & diving page with the full year's schedule and results. Be sure to come cheer on the Panthers at the METRO Swim and Dive Championships this weekend at the Germantown Swim Center, and come out to Holton on Tues., Feb. 11, at 4 p.m. for the final swim meet of the year against Paul VI High School!

Congratulations to Sophie Whiteway '20 for her commitment to play lacrosse at the Division I level at Princeton University! Sophie joins classmates Francesca Cetta '20 and Jillian Johnson '20 as Division I bound athletes.

Before taking the field, Whiteway was a competitive gymnast. After winning the Maryland USAG State Meet, it was particularly difficult for her to walk away, but she knew she loved playing lacrosse and wanted to focus her attention on a new sport.

Whiteway knew from an early age that she wanted to pursue lacrosse at the Division I level. "My father was a DI collegiate athlete at the US Naval Academy and always encouraged me to excel in athletics, as he feels there are many benefits to playing sports in college," Whiteway shared.

Though the road to recruitment is always hard and usually rocky, Whiteway's journey became longer than expected. Beginning in eighth grade, Whiteway hit the ground running, working towards a likely DI commitment by the end of her freshman year. By that fall, she started to receive offers from a variety of DI schools. After taking visits, shadowing classes and meeting with coaches, Whiteway decided she wanted to wait until the end of the spring lacrosse season to make her decision. In April, the NCAA changed the recruiting rules, preventing any further contact with college coaches until September 1 of her junior year. This meant that not only could Whiteway not receive any additional offers, but she could not respond either.

While frustrating in some regards, this gave Whiteway more time to explore other programs and keep her options open. Once September 1 came, she received an overwhelming amount of interest and additional offers. After spending the month of September going on official and unofficial visits, she had narrowed down her top choices between Princeton, University of Pennsylvania, Duke, and Cornell.

Ultimately on October 3, 2018, she chose Princeton because of its balance of high-level academics and athletics. "Coach Sailer, the Princeton women's lacrosse head coach, is really invested in her athletes. She encourages them to not only be the best on the field but also in the classroom and in life. I immediately felt a connection with her and the team and knew that I wanted to spend my four years of college at Princeton," Whiteway said.

Whiteway feels prepared to take on the challenges of being a student-athletes. She says, "The rigor of Holton academics and playing 12 seasons of varsity sports required me to focus on time management, organization, and communication with my teachers. Taking high-level courses pushed me to challenge myself, which is something I want to continue doing in college. As an athlete, Holton has allowed me to lead by example and push myself."

Whiteway is incredibly thankful for all the people who have helped her reach her goals.

"Throughout my life I have had so many great coaches that have challenged me to excel on the field. Most of all I would like to thank my family, in particular my mom for her endless support and the countless hours spent taking me from lacrosse practice, to tournaments, and camps all over the country. My family and friends have always supported me and encouraged me to stay humble and keep working hard, regardless of external factors."

Congratulations, Sophie!